I fell right through the crack. Now, I’m trying to get back.

I don’t know what happens to me once I get done with a set of exams. It’s like I forget how to study. This period is when I’m at my laziest. I just want to lie around in bed all day, watch movies and read books.

I went to see Turning 30 with people from college yesterday. Kaafi useless thi. I knew it would be faaltu but, I still wanted to see it because it had Purab Kohli in it. I’ve been crushing on that guy ever since Hip Hip Hurray first aired on television.

Saw the season premiere of Californication abhi. Hank Moody is yum. And my hair does look like Becca’s! If only mine could retain the straightness forever. *sigh*

Done being random. Later.

You know what I hate?

 

Waiting.

I’ve come to realize that I have zero patience. I hate not having what I want when I want it. I plan for the future, yes. But, if I had it my way, I wouldn’t have to because the future would mean right now.

I hate call-waiting with a passion. If I want to talk to someone, I should be put through to them when I call them – after half a ring. The ‘put on hold’ option shouldn’t even exist when someone’s talking to me on the phone. Don’t even talk to me about people not calling back when it’s their turn to.

You know how when you’re almost-best friends with someone you take turns to call each other? Like if they call you once, you call them the next time and vice versa? I hate when people don’t do that. Because I always end up calling/texting even though I did so the last, say, three times and that upsets the whole power-balance in the relationship.

Yes, I think about power-balances even though I’m only eighteen. Yet another back-handed advantage of being a Capricorn.

Planes and Bombay Rains

Ever been woken up in the dead of the night (crack of dawn, whatever) by a rumbling sound that makes you think the alien mothership is landing? I have.

The place I've been staying at for the last three weeks in Santa Cruz, Mumbai is so close to the airport, I can hear the people on the international flights (because only those fly at such odd times) being given the "Aagey do dwaar, peechhey do dwaar" speech by the stewardesses.

Bombay, I've realised, is a peculiar city. One moment it's a perfectly sunny day; I have my aviators on. The very next second, there's a crack of thunder and I'm totally drenched. People here don't have the same tendency to, well, show-off as North-Indians (us Punjabis leading the lot!) do. Coincidentally, this is one of the major complaints Mumbaikars have against Delhi.

Roads here seem to be meant for vehicles as well as pedestrians. First, you honk and clear your way. Then, you get stuck in traffic.

But, there is no road-rage. This is a laidback city with patient, easygoing people. Where Delhi drivers would've honked their horns and hurled abuses at the other drivers till their throats were sore, Mumbai drivers wait patiently for the car in front of them to move. Quite the culture shock, considering I've grown up with the notion firmly implanted in my brain that red lights are meant to be ignored, speed limits destined to be broken and vehicles meant to be overtaken!

I should be in the gym right now but, I can't be bothered enough to get up and walk [Yeah, walk. Chandigarh, remember?] to the Club.

What I'm doing instead is flipping through my journal. Now, I've been writing in this one since the 6th of January, 2007 and most of it is filled with rants and general teenage angst. Some of the earlier entries are so cringeworthy, I feel like picking up a marker and editing stuff. And by editing I mean striking the whole thing off.

Some phases of my life that will make your eyes fall out from all the eye-rolling :-

Period: January, 2007
Description: Documenting every insignificant detail of my mundane 8th grade life a lá Mia Thermopolis
Example: 1.5 pages long entry about an aquarium in some airport
Eye-roll rating: 2/5

Period: February, 2007 - November 2008
Description: Unhealthy obsession with Crush-To-End-All-Crushes
Example: 3 pages long entry about how He hugged me on New Year's
Eye-role rating: 4.5/5

Period: January, 2009 - March, 2009
Description: Hindi translation of every entry to help with Hindi Board Exam
Example: Mera apne aap se vayda hai ki main ab se apne vichaar angrezi ke saath-saath Hindi mein bhi likha karoongi. Isse na keval bhasha ki shudhata evam manakta par dhyan diya jaayega...need more?
Eye-roll rating: 3/5


Now that we've succesfully established that I was a loser, I'll head to the gym! Not that it's making much of a difference. 3 weeks of gymming and all I've managed to lose is 60 grams. Seriously. -_-

Anyway. I'm off!


PS: Why is CBSE hell-bent on fucking with our lives? It hasn't even declared the date for the results, yet! Result nikalna to door ki baat hai.

I've finally started studying. Acing my tooshuns. Who cares about shitty school?

School's officially over, by the way. Fun. I always thought the day my school got over would be a momentous day. You know, something should happen that makes me remember the 1st of December as my last ever day of school. Waited for that moment the entire day. Never came. Oh, sure. Pictures were clicked, shirts were signed. Some people even cried. I, on the other hand, threw around some shoes, wrote chape cliches on people's shirt sleeves [because, come on. I don't even know you that well.] and generally pranced around, not understanding what all the emotion was for. Maybe it'll sink in sometime later.

Or maybe it already has and I don't really care because the end of school means the start of COLLEGE! Phew. Can hardly wait.

Grow UP.

Why why WHY does this happen?

Just when I finally start to really like a guy, I find something about him that puts me off. I mean, I know Rocky thinks grammar is of absolutely no use while writing and he uses those annoying short forms like "ma" for "my" and "da" for "the" on facebook. Also, almost everything he posts on his guy friends' walls is followed by "bro". Case in point: "Thanx bro. How are you bro?" Ugh.

And that's okay. Loads of people write like that. S'not a problem. But, what I found out IS.

He's shorter than me.

I know, I know. You're prolly wondering why I hadn't noticed that in all this while. The thing is, we're almost always sitting. In tuition. Even when we're waiting to be picked up outside tuition, we're always sitting on somebody or the other's scooty or on the steps or something. Or one of us is sitting and the other is standing. And he looked tall enough. Imagine my surprise when I stand next to him and find that he doesn't come up to the mark. Quite literally.

I'm 5'8" and a half. And I've always been kinda conscious of my height. [That and my shoe size, 9. S'not MY fault I'm tall. And it's not really an anomaly! Bloody shopkeepers with their astonished looks and "itna BADA pair kaise kar liya aapne?!" Nonsense.] Ek to because I was always the tallest one in my class in Sanskriti. [Didn't matter so much in Carmel, because all of us were kids, then. So.] I was the tallest till the 9th gade when everybody started shooting up. Thank God. [There was only ONE guy who was always taller than me. He was my crush to end all crushes. Liked him for 3 bloody years. He's gone and turned into a jerk, now. But, whatever.]

The point is, I always used to WAIT for the 11th and 12th grades because I thought I wouldn't be the tallest one anymore. But then, we shifted to Chandigarh. And I got admitted into an all-girls school. So, yeah. I'm the tallest again. [Along with another girl who has the same first name as mine. What's in a name, my ass. Maybe it is the name.]

All my hopes rest on college, now. 5 months to go...

School is the usual. Authority figures suck. People are fun. The latest that happened was MC [that's Sister Maria-Christie. The Principal.] calling Pa up and telling him I've been late 3 times this month [Absolute lie. Only twice. Eheh.]. Anyway. That's not even the part that's important. She insinuated I was getting late because there was some "problem" at home. God. Like someone can't be late for school simply because they got up late.

"The Crucial Year" vaali feeling is starting to set in. Aaj school mein these people from Glion Hospitality Management Institutes or something had ome to give a presentation. And this really cool counsellor had come with them [humaare school vaali SUCKS. She tells every bloody thing to MC. No point in going to her. You'll just become fodder for the gossip.] and he talked about how you should set your goal first and then work backwards while planning your career. So, I started thinking. I want to do Management, okay. Marketing. [Wanted to do the copywriting stuff pehle, but it pays really less and money matters.] And I want to go outside India for that. Exposure and bloody freedom.

Anyway. For that, I have to graduate. Uske liye, main sochri thi ke I'll give the CPT exam [that's for Chartered Accountancy] next June. The reasults and all will come out in like a month. Tab tak I'll get admitted into a good college [hopefully, SRCC or Stephen's] for B.Comm. Hons. or Eco. Hons. CA mein there's no institute, wokay. Everything is hands-on. You study and give exams for around 1 year and then intern in an organisation [like an accounting firm or something] and work a 9-5 day. Plus study and sit for exams alongside. So, I'm going to do the first year in College normally. Then leave college, do B.Comm. or Eco [whatever I like best by the time the Boards end] by correspondence and do my CA. I'll become a qualified CA at the end of 2.5 years - which is earlier than I'll become a graduate. So, I'll prolly work as a CA for around 1 or 2 years. Build the funds. Give the TOEFL and GMATs and all [whatever's needed for Post-Graduation] and then apply outside for an MBA.

Let's see how it works out.